Tuesday, February 3, 2009

A mystery wrapped in an enigma?

So I had a kind of strange thing happen to me over the weekend, and it kind of made me question some things, so I thought I'd share. There is currently a phenomenon going around Facebook called "25 Random Things", or some such equivalent. You write a note with 25 things about yourself, then tag 25 other people to do the same. I had been tagged a number of times and finally decided to give it a go. Here's the list in case you haven't read it.

Anyways, after I posted my list, one of my very very good friends (Deb, I'm talking about you :)), called me and was very surprised by much of what was on the list. She also had no idea that I was a blogger, and asked to read my blog. She later said that after reading my list and blog, she felt like she didn't really know me. That got me thinking: Do people really know me at all? (And BTW, I just totally got a flash of Carrie typing away on her pink laptop in Sex and the City). I came up with this conclusion. I'm really not much of a sharer. I am a listener. I don't really know why I'm that way, not that there's anything wrong with it. But, I was kind of saddened that people really don't know who I am. Maybe that's my fault. Maybe I need to share more. I am currently embarking on an honesty campaign with my husband (hee hee) and perhaps I need to expand this campaign to other areas of my life. Because if the people who love me only love me for the surface me, perhaps that's not really love at all. I often don't say what I feel, or don't give opinions because it's just easier to stay quiet and not stir things up. I truly don't like to argue, and while my opinions of things may differ sometimes, it's usually just simpler for me not to elaborate, but just to listen. I did a lot of this during the recent election, even with my husband. Despite the fact that I am a Christian, my political leanings are much more liberal. Many people that I know and love are very conservative. Instead of trying to engage them in debate every few minutes, I chose just to listen. I respect every one's right to an opinion. I think I need to trust more that people will respect mine. (And, after all, Jesus was considered quite the radical in his time!)

1 comment:

Mimi said...

You are who you are, and you are a lovely person. You have always been more of a listener, quiet and introspective. There is nothing wrong with that. You have to be comfortable with yourself--that is important.