Tuesday, March 29, 2011

And this pretty much explains why I don't cook

Lest anyone think I am that clever, let me tell you that I I found this here. And it is the sad, yet hilariously honest truth. Here's what I hate about cooking:

  • The deciding what exactly I am going to cook part. Menu planning. Snore city.
  • The going shopping for ingredients I am never going to use again part. Dried mustard seed anyone? Anyone ever using that again?
  • The cutting up of things part. Paring knives are not my friends. Neither are peelers.
  • The touching of raw meat part. There is probably some sort of mathematical equation to sum up how the more I have to touch raw meet the less likely I am to want to eat it later.
  • The mess left on the stove that my husband won't clean up part.
  • The having tons of dishes to wash part. See above about husband not cleaning part.
  • The my kids saying "What's this", and "I don't like (insert crap food I made here)"
  • The having leftovers that I know I won't eat but make me feel vaguely guilty part.
  • The having to dispose of those leftovers weeks later and seeing what has become of them part and again feeling non-virtuous and like I am wasting the planet's natural resources because I don't like leftover squash and noodle casserole.
Here's what I like about cooking:
  • Um, nothing. I don't even usually like what I cooked, and even if I do, the things I hate about the experience far outweigh the possible food goodness. Because I can achieve food goodness from opening a bag of potato chips and eating them with lots of dip and there is little to no clean up from that.
So, yeah. I said it. And now I'll go see what's in the refrigerator to make for dinner.


Tamara said...

Loved this post! We were having the very same discussion at school this afternoon, and when the hubby and I were trying to decide on a menu for tonight, we landed on...McDonald's! Terrible choice, nutritionally, but the dishes never got done last night (I'm supposed to be doing them NOW, hah), and the only leftover in the fridge was cooked cabbage that I should just throw away now before it gets any worse.

Tobye said...

We had ChickFilA. Total health nuts.